May 26, 2021
You know the sensation you get when people discount your feelings? Like when you’re noticing a feeling and someone says, “Just think about something good or happy.” That’s toxic positivity. Being positive has become a new normal for moral correctness and it’s actually causing us harm.
Toxic positivity is the belief that no matter how dire or difficult a situation is, people should maintain a positive mindset. It's a "good vibes only" approach to life. And while there are benefits to being an optimist and engaging in positive thinking, toxic positivity instead rejects difficult emotions in favor of a cheerful, often falsely positive, facade.
In this episode, Love Coach, Rosa Maxwell and I speak openly about our behaviors of toxic optimism (a term she coined for herself), some examples of toxic positivity, and why we should show up to our difficult feelings. We discuss a little bit of shadow work integration, and some stuff around “the need to fix” and why we want to take away peoples pain. Rosa shares with us an example in her own relationship of how to redirect your partner when they are “trying to fix you.”
Interesting in working with a Sex & Relationship Coach? Apply for 1on1 coaching with me: www.ellenmelon.com/intimacy-coaching
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About Ellen Melon: Sex & Relationship Coach and Un-Educator
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Links we talked about:
More on Toxic Positivity: https://www.verywellmind.com/what-is-toxic-positivity-5093958
https://www.rosamaxwell.co.uk/
https://www.instagram.com/rosamaxwell/
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Sources:
Brene Brown, Dare to Lead Podcast, Episode on Emotional Agility by Dr Susan David